Word Around The Camp Fire
Native American Comedy Podcast - Talking about Native American Daily life and struggles while having fun and making fun of being Native
Word Around The Camp Fire
Glonnie Pies
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Just a quick Good Friday podcast with the homie shells. Random talk, and some Glonnie Pies
Welcome all, welcome all. Welcome all. Word around the campfire. You got shells and your girl, it might be strong one, sprung one. Gathering closes, we make fun of butt hurt, but how you date your cousin, hate your cousin. But remember, y'all, it's just jokes. Welcome to the podcast. Word around the campfire. Word of your mother.
SPEAKER_03Yep, and then I was just like, man, it's crazy that it's a good Friday, because today's the day that Jesus died, you know? And then um, three days later he came back like a lot of these people's ex. God damn, like the baby daddy. Like the baby daddy, yeah, we gotta try and get rid of your baby daddy. Hey! What's up, ladies and gentlemen? We want to welcome you guys to the podcast. Word around the campfire. I'm Mike Pinta, and we got the man, the myth, the legend, the uh auntie or the uncle slayer killer. Hey. I don't know if you would call it that.
unknownHey!
SPEAKER_03But he's not a um he he's against uh domestic violence, though. Only when it comes to roasts. And uh he's uh all in. I'm all about words. He's all about words, man. Equal rights, equal fights, man. I use my words on my face.
SPEAKER_04Let's use words, let's use words.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, what is up, bro? Hey, it's fucking good Friday, bro. Hey, good Friday, man. So happy Good Friday to all of you. Did you you guys oh it's obvious you didn't even have today off, man, you know? Um yeah, bro, it's good Friday, bro. And Good Friday. Fuck out the work today, bro. Damn, I know, man. I was I totally forgot it was Good Friday, but then again, I totally forgot that this weekend is Easter Sunday, too, man. So Jesus died today, right? Yeah, Jesus died. The math don't add up. Yeah. Well, well, that that's just me. I don't know. Um because he died today, then it says three days he rose from the dead, which is Sunday. Yeah. So is so today's one day, right? Yeah. Or would it have to have been on Thursday that he died, and then Friday's one day, and then Saturday, and then Sunday's the third day.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Is that I think that's how it works, right? I think that's how I don't I have no idea, man. Jesus. It's Jesus, man. It's been a while since I've been in church, so hey, what's it say way in the background? Yeah, yeah, yeah. First one out? Now I just sit in the back, man, eat all the snacks and then skip out, man.
SPEAKER_02Last one to come, first one out.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, last one to come, first one out. Man, that was some but some churches, man, their worship just takes forever, bro. Damn, I bet. Man, like two hours or something, you know, just same same old song. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Same old song on Recycle. Yeah, Jesus on the main line all night, man. Tell them what you want. Dude, what's yeah, when you go to re when you went to revivals, was that the song that they sang? Yeah, bro, it's like fucking number one hit song is Jesus on the main line.
SPEAKER_04Jesus on the main line. Tell them what you're saying.
SPEAKER_03And it's not even uh it's not even like a clear version, it's all Red's down, man. Tell them what you want, Jesus on the main man.
SPEAKER_04Off courts, yeah, off courts, man. And then they just start making up lyrics. Jesus in the bathroom, tell them what you want. Jesus in the bathroom. For real. That's what you could just freaking make up.
SPEAKER_02Man, it's just the whole choir gets off like the whole choir just freaking.
SPEAKER_03That's not how the song goes, man. It's like, no, but that's that's how it goes, man. Jesus, Jesus in the restroom with you. Tell him what you want.
SPEAKER_02Oh man. Somebody's gonna get hurt. Next um new release song. Yeah, you go, man. You gotta use a Johnny Cash beat. Johnny Cash version.
SPEAKER_03Uh Johnny Cash song with the train? Um no, I almost said uh walk the line, not walk the line. Uh what was it, man? Hear the train of cool. Yeah. I hear the train of count away. And talking about music, bro, we got a question in that I forgot to answer a w a long time ago about uh res bands. Do you get into res bands? Res bands. Like state lines. Some of them are cool, but some of them are cool. That's the same thing with with res bands, bro. Like you can literally make up literally make up anything. Like, there's there's a band out there, Lightning Rock. Uh, they're pretty cool. Uh they they're playing all over the place now, and some of their songs kind of sound the same. Uh like I I always just make fun of it, man, because they're just they some of their songs are res now, man. Like, just and it's so easy, bro. It's so easy to be resed out and make a song. Bam. This is one of their songs, man. It's called like Picture Perfect Memory. And when he sings it, he sounds like he's all buzzed out, man. Picture Perfect Memory. Like he doesn't even remember you.
SPEAKER_04Why are you singing along? He doesn't even remember you, man.
SPEAKER_03Oh man.
SPEAKER_02There you go.
SPEAKER_03Oh, dude, man.
SPEAKER_02Like northern edge. Yup, yup.
SPEAKER_03He saw you at northern edge, then you forgot you. Yeah, a couple couple hours later, man, he forgot you.
SPEAKER_04You saw you standing there. Then you saw me too. Damn. That's all you were a picture, picture perfect memory. Yeah, that's all you were, man.
SPEAKER_03You forgot your name. You weren't even a picture perfect memory. You're just a fucking memory.
SPEAKER_04Just a bust out memory. Yeah, there we go. We need to remix that to that. You're just a bust out memory.
SPEAKER_05Damn!
SPEAKER_04Damn.
SPEAKER_05That's the shit we call it.
SPEAKER_03Damn, that is too freaking funny, man. But man. I don't know, man. One one of you aunties he was talking about, man. That's all he thought of you guys. It was just a memory, yeah. He told him your name and he forgot. Yeah, he forgot, man. He just uh brown shirt. Damn, hey brown shirt. Hey, brown shirt. And black shirt. Hey glasses. Hey glasses, come here.
SPEAKER_04Oh man. Damn, hey glasses.
SPEAKER_03Hey glasses, brown shirt, come here. Hey, white pants, white pants, come here.
unknownWhite pants.
SPEAKER_03White pants. Wait, are there still white pants? White pants, though.
SPEAKER_02Come on, buy me some girl.
SPEAKER_03Dude, man, I remember when Miller's outpost had all the white pants, man. I remember buying like one just about every every month, man, because I kept getting dirty, bro. Damn. Like the the the the desk seats at at school just. When I first met you you were wearing white pants, man.
SPEAKER_04I think so, man. Not gonna lie, man. Baggy white pants, man. That was, bro.
SPEAKER_02When I first met you, we were wearing baggy white pants. I was, man. I'm not shameful for it.
SPEAKER_03You gotta see my 20s through it, man. Your song. Yeah, every every time I wore my white pants, I sweat commando. So you could just see what's black in front of it. You gotta make sure you go to the restaurant and and and uh what do you call it? Um shake right, man. You know, if you didn't shake right and get all that axis off, man. You freaking get some yellow on there, and that's it, man. You're known as yellow pants now. Go back to Miller's outposts. Go to Miller's Outpost and get another another uh what do you call it? A set, man, white pants. Another pidger perfect memory. Another then you just end up being a pidger perfect memory, man. Yeah, that's too funny, man. But shout out to everybody that goes to those dances and uh listen to the Res bands. And there's a couple Res bands out there that are actually pretty good, man. Shout out to Apache Spirit, Apache Spirit's OGs, man, of native Res bands and State Line too as well. Um I know State Line had a little falling out there for a little bit. Team Mo and Team, I don't know who the other one was, man. Team Mo and T Mo. T Moe and T Mo and T Moo, Team Moo, Tamoo. But yeah, man, we are on our way home right now, man. Shells was freaking awesome enough to pick me up in Gallup. It was uh freaking long. Man, this week just felt fucking long, bro. Man, man, but I'm not gonna do it. I was like, fuck, is it Friday yet? For real, man. It's like Good Friday, I'm not working. Fuck I'm working. Hey, I know. I like I said, I totally spaced that this weekend is is uh Easter. I thought it was until next week. But looked at the calendar today, today was Good Friday. I'm just like, why the fuck am I not off? It's Good Friday, you know? Damn. Where's your religious side? I said that's everything. Hey yeah. We're not religious, we're traditional. We're not religious, we're traditional here. We're following that white man's religious. Teach me then. That's what I said. Teach me then. Teach me then.
unknownDamn.
SPEAKER_03Plans. I I know we talked about plans for Easter, man. You guys got you guys got plans going out for Easter, man? Yeah, I got plans, bro.
SPEAKER_02But I gotta know the clans first.
SPEAKER_03Oh man, man. Ladies, ladies, don't hold out on clans, man. Alright, I know you like them a lot, but make sure that you tell them your clans and make sure that he tells you his clans. That way it's not awkward at family reunions when you guys see each other there and like, what are you doing here? And you guys are supposed to wearing the Johnson family reunion shirt. The baguetzy.
SPEAKER_02We talked about this already, but you think it's weird, like like if somebody were to kiss their cousin and then see each other at the family reunion?
SPEAKER_03Oh, I think it would be weird, bro. I think it would be weird. I mean, not that I kiss my cousin, but she I mean, like, alright, so so in order for you sorry time in order for you to kiss your cousin, bro, your cousin has to be hot. Damn. And how how much of a Joe Dirt are you gonna be calling your cousin hot? Joe. Joe Dirt, man! But man, okay, uh, like I said, man, uh when it when it comes to cousins and stuff like that, that's why it's so hard to date Native Americans, man. Or not not Native Americans, but Navajos, man, because you know, you don't know who's your cousin, you don't know if you're related, because the clan system's just all over the place, man. So whoever came up with the clan system again, man, fuck you. Fuck you and your clan system, man, you know.
SPEAKER_02And they're just making it longer now.
SPEAKER_03Just making it longer now, man. Just like, eh. Oh, we forgot to add this in the show. Oh, we forgot to add this, and what's your what's your clan? Uh-uh, um touch sheet me. Oh, you mean you're touchy, you touch me? Yep, I touch you. That's what I want to do, but you're my cousin.
SPEAKER_02Um touch touchy me, but behind the hook on here.
SPEAKER_03I'm touching me, but but behind the hook on a touchy couple. And uh I'm cross shit because I want to make your bottom red. So do you think about the clan system, bro? I don't know, bro. Like, uh now it's just getting longer. It is, bro. I I honestly I I need to actually sit down and figure that out. Like, like who how did the clans even come about, man? Like uh, you know, it's just um they just saw uh what do you call it? Uh what was one of the river or the water clans? Um like were they just standing by you know a puddle or was somebody peeing and they just like oh it's a puddle right there, so your topaying with grandma's water. So grandma's water, right? And freaking just uh your topaha, eh? Because you're playing with water, hey. But man, that's uh that's always been like something that I wanted to do, man. Is is um my voice cracked on that. I always wanted to do man hit puberty right there. I'll follow your man.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, bro, I just don't care how long it's getting now. It's like topay behind the rock or something like that.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, Tobaha, and mush chin, all this stuff. Just like, what the heck? Like you're just fucking adding on clans. Adding on clans and clans, and then at the end it's fire rock. Damn.
SPEAKER_04What a fucking fire rock. Yeah, into a fire rock. Damn. Oh man.
SPEAKER_03But what are these days, man? I'm gonna I'm going to dude to go down a rabbit hole and dig and and see how the clans did come about. I'm pretty sure there's a there's a cool story about it, but man, like, man, can you whoever updates the clan system, we said it before, can you boo, boo, boo. I'm talking you, boo. Can you stop updating the clans that way? It's not it's hard for people. Because I read an article, uh, I can't remember where I read it, but in the Portabody up, and I saw your name on there too. Hey But I read an article on how um, you know, like like some Native Americans, their bloodline is just kind of all over the place now, you know? Yeah. And when it comes to Navajos, that that that's how it is because of the clan system. Like, you know, it's it's taboo to marry your cousin that your cousin, of course, is taboo, and it's probably against the law in some places. Damn. But it's crazy. Yeah, yeah. People are kissing her sisters. Hey, uh, right now, man. Right now. Right now, you're listening to this podcast with your sister. Right now, you're listening to this podcast with your sister, and man, this dumb fuck doesn't even know how to drive on this side, man. You had the whole time. Okay, so we're we just passed Sheep Springs. There's Ford truck, Ford. Had to be a Ford. You fucking four drivers out there, man. Freaking pull over and let it blow up on its own. But this this truck pulled out way, way ahead of us. And it decides to get on our lane, right, when we're getting ready to pass it. Dumbass. Dumbass. So they you uh you received the dumbass award of today on Good Friday in honor of Jesus going to the cross and dying for your sins. He died for your dumbass dick. For your dumb ass driving, then but in all honesty, somebody right now is listening to this podcast with their cousin. Damn. Holding their hands. God damn. Looking into their eyes, telling them your eyes look familiar. Your cousin, that's why. You kind of look like my auntie. You kind of look like my auntie, yeah, then Rical.
SPEAKER_05You kind of look like my uncle. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03How come you look like my uncle? How come you have the same last name as my uncle?
unknownThat's fucked up.
SPEAKER_03Well, man, but one day I am going to uh go go down the rabbit hole and I'm going to figure out where the where the original clans came from and what how it really originated, I guess you could say, you know? That's a big rabbit hole. That is a big rabbit hole, man, because there is fucking yeah, there's clans upon clans upon clans upon clans, and I we wish I wish some sometimes we were just kind of like um these other natives, like up north. And then even Hopies, like even Hopi's, they have like a one clan system, you know? And um, so shout out to all my Hopies out there, man. Love you guys, man. Sorry that we were making fun of you there for a little bit. But I'm back, baby! But I'm back, man. Uh but yeah, man, like um, and it's cool, like I said, some of these uh some of these bands, I guess they call them, uh, these clans up north, you know, they have freaking really cool, freaking really cool clans, you know. They are all over here on this side, just making up clans, and fire rock, uh, Hokan, and all this stuff clans, and for the baloney nick clan. Yeah, for the baloney nick clan, and baloney string clan, and oh man. That's crazy, man. That is pretty crazy, man. But yeah, man, enough with enough with the clans. Hey yeah, we're getting depressed now, hey. Hey, I'm getting depressed. I'm getting depressed because you're my clan. Getting depressed because from the bottom of my heart. Yeah. Damn!
SPEAKER_04Dude, holy shit, man. I I already knew, I already knew, man, as soon as I said that. Somebody, somebody was going to get hurt about that, man.
SPEAKER_03Like, uh, but you know what? I thank you for the bottom of my heart for listening. So from the bottom of their heart is the fucking guts, the intestines. The guts, the intestines, where you shit, where you pee. So uh how much you love them? How much you love them? Damn, ew, ew, dam. I got yo, I got an email about that. It was just like, it was so funny because the email was just like, why do you guys always gotta take something that's like positive and make it into something negative? Damn. And I was like, I didn't make it into negative, that was just my opinion. My opinion, man. I was like, fuck. That is true. Yup, yo, I was like, Yeah, I was like, what the heck, man? Freaking, you can't say anything. I mean, from the bottom of my heart. She's cheating. She says that to you, she's cheating. If he says that to you, he's cheating. That or he's your cousin you're related to him. God damn, because it's from the bottom. Because it's from the bottom, man. Alright, just because Drake said we started from the bottom, now we're at the top, doesn't mean that, you know. Those are not Drake lyrics, alright? But yeah, dude, I already knew, man. I already knew. I was like, damn, as soon as I say this, man, people are going to, you know, but I don't know, bro. Like lately, man, I've been um caring. I've been caring about what people say. Uh-uh. Honestly, uh, at the point. Hey, oh man, lately, eh?
SPEAKER_02This chuck that won't go down.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, we can punch it. Have you have you uh have you ever had a chubb that just wanna go away? Fuck. Like just I just came out of nowhere and then just want to go away. No, not that I can think of. Oh, so when you get when you when you're um trying to get a chub, like, like are you all like nasty thoughts or just it's all natural, bruh? It's all natural. Natural, bruh. I'm I'm looking at it right now to see if he has one. Damn. Oh shit. It's a natural thing. It's a natural thing. As soon as he said that, it's all woo.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02Oh man, that's too that's too funny, man. Um what did Pi face say about the last podcast?
SPEAKER_03Oh, she's she's gonna get ready, man. So so Kess, uh Kess is getting ready to get creamed. Damn. She's gonna get creamed on her face. She's uh she's ready. She's ready, bro. She's ready. So we excuse me. So we're gonna have to set that up, man. So I'll I'll um I guess just whenever you guys schedule, um how many pies? Because when we said pies, there's an S at the end of pies.
SPEAKER_02So, you know, we went three rounds.
SPEAKER_03Three rounds with three pies? Three times? Okay, so three rounds times three, that's nine. Yeah, there we go. Now we're talking about nine pies to the base, Kessa. So Kessa, you better get ready. Make sure that you uh uh what do you call it? You know what? I'm gonna warm up the pies, man. Oh, you're gonna warm them up? Put them in a microwave. Yeah, put them in microwave, warm them up. Damn, man. Kessa look! Freaking just out of nowhere, just put higher, man. So are you are uh your your strategy? Oh well I don't want to give away your strategy how you're gonna fire. Um but just just just to give some kind of visual are you gonna be throwing it or like straight up in the face? Like a foot and just I got I got nine pies, bro. Nah, nine pies.
SPEAKER_02There you go. You can I'm gonna fucking want launch one from my house. I'm gonna launch one from a fucking airplane. Freaking run towards her and launch it and freaking And I'm gonna have a Glawny launch one at her. Dude, you should you definitely should have a Glawny throw one at her.
SPEAKER_04Dude, that's fucking funny, man. Clonny pie.
SPEAKER_03Guess I got clonny pie, dad. So that sounds like a series, bro. Clonny pie, man. Clonie pie. Like we just uh just randomly grab a bunch of clonnies and put them in the van and then clonny pie people. Fuck yeah, that'd be awesome to do that. Dude, that would be funny, man. I bet you they would have so much fun, man. So so if you guys out there wanna want somebody to get pie, let us know. Uh we'll we'll uh grab some glanies and uh we'll we'll give them some pies and then we'll visit whoever wants to be. That's a good idea, bro.
SPEAKER_02I'm not gonna do it. Guanis are gonna do it for me. Yeah, there you go. Uh we'll grab nine random nine random guannies.
SPEAKER_03I'm gonna pie you. Yep, from Farmutin to Chabrose. Then you can check that off your bucket list. I always wanted to be glanipie too. I always wanna be creep pie by Guani Pie.
SPEAKER_04I always wanted to be Cream Pie by Gwani. Ah, dick! Oh man, dude.
SPEAKER_03We officially found the name of the podcast episode tonight, man. Glani Pie, and Clamp Pie. That kind of sounds like an adult movie, too, man. Kessa for Kessa from from the podcast. Oh, dang, glani pie. Freaking all access right there, man. Dang, man. Oh shit, man. That is fucking too hilarious, man. Glani pie, bro. Fucking castle and get glanipie. Yeah, that's so. Um, we can we gotta find a way to either go live, use somebody's live, and just that way we can we we have some, or I'll film it too, but I don't know if there's a way that we might be up to be able to upload it on the on the podcast website. Uh but if you guys are out there, you guys are listening, you guys are on social media, and you would let us use your platform. Hey platform, I'm a TikToker. I have a platform, have a platform, so respect it. Respect it. We're gonna push you off your platform, man. Piacchi. Clonypie you too, man. Clonny Pie you off your platform. Oh man, but if you guys if you guys have any kind of social media out there, you would let us use your um your what do you call it, account information. We won't read your DMs. Hashtag GlonnyPie. Hashtag Glani Pie. And we freaking uh we'll go live with it. And uh that way, you know, people can see uh Glessa uh Glesa. Damn, we see Kessa get glanipied, man. And we have we have to find a date too. And the background's a VR, what is it? I lost everything. Yeah, in the background, I lost everything. Yeah, playing in the background slowly, man. Man, sorry, Kessa. That's good. Nine pies, nine pies, nine pies, nine glonny pies. That's why, that's why when you go into uh, I guess you could say a contest, they always say you gotta read the rules. Damn. You gotta listen out for the puns, the the um if there's something hidden in there, you know? And uh we we enunciated pies. So the fine print. The fine print right there. So since you lost three times in the rounds, and what was it? Three rounds, three rounds, you lost three times. You lost three times. So three times three is nine. Damn. It's nine. It's nine. So you better be ready, Kess. You better be ready, Kessa. He's coming for you with them glani pies, eh? Damn. Glani pies are coming, Kessa. Glani pies are coming, he's gonna pop up right when you're riding the bike and shit up in your face. Fall into a bush again. Same bush.
SPEAKER_02Hit her so hard, she's gonna fall back into cell block beat.
SPEAKER_03Oh yeah. Never happened. Never happen.
SPEAKER_04Oh man. That's too freaking hilarious, man.
SPEAKER_02Oh man. So hard her elbows aren't turned white.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. Turn back into white, man. Oh shit, man. That is too funny, man. Oh, man.
SPEAKER_03Kessa, we're just joking, man. And again, I gotta give props to Kessa, man. She's always a good sport, man. She's always a good sport. Can always dish it out, too. And um uh so big up to Kessa. So again, if you guys want to let us use your social media or whatever, uh, just um let us know. We'll log into it. Promise we won't read your DMs, promise we won't respond to your sneaky links, uh, send any pictures. Hey, that one we can't promise, but we'll we'll try, we'll try, we'll try. But let us know. Yep, yeah, that way we can we can put it on all your platforms. And hashtag Lonnie Pie. Yep, hashtag Lonnie Pie, man, and we can make it go viral. I think I did this viral viral video. Okay, okay, so so with your with your pie, are you gonna do whipped cream or are you just gonna do like straight shaped cream?
SPEAKER_02You know, like my favorite pie to eat, bro, is fucking pumpkin pies. Pumpkin pie? Pumpkin pie it is.
SPEAKER_03Oh man. Nine of pumpies. Nine pumpkin pies. Oh, the big one up! There you go, man. So nine freaking what are those 12 inches? Yeah, I think we got three five or four inches. Let me let me buy one and measure it. Dang it. Oh shit, okay. 12. Damn, man, that's uh that's a big pie. Hey, anybody who has EBT, let me know. Hey! If you guys want to donate some of your EBT before Trump takes it all away from you guys. Hey, so if you guys are wanna go to Sam's Club and buy a pumpkin pie? Yo, man, dude, to pie kessa. Let us know, man. Let us know. That's nine pies, bro, man. You guys can buy apple pie too. Apple pie. Oh, you don't be fucked up. It's all the pecan through that fucking scraper based on them. All scratch parts, yeah. Pecan pie. Or uh like a real real crazy one, and like um apple crumble with all the sugar, sugar, uh, sugar flakes on top.
SPEAKER_04Fucking cut.
SPEAKER_05Oh shit, man. That's fucking funny, man. Yo, man, fucking.
SPEAKER_02Oh, scrape them afterwards. Okay, she's probably she's probably used to the stickiness. How long did she say she's been in jail? Three nights? Yeah. Yeah, she's used to the stickiness. She's used to no showers for three days.
SPEAKER_03Oh man, that's too bad.
SPEAKER_05She's used to that.
SPEAKER_02Damn, that is hilarious, man.
SPEAKER_03There you go. They're all nine, nine pecan pies, man. And it's gonna be freaking awesome. So pecan by a clani. Oh, man. And then afterwards, we'll tell the clani to say you just got pecan. Give her the uh participation awards.
SPEAKER_02Participation award, man. There you go, man. Oh, yeah, that's too fucking hilarious, man. Or what do you call those?
SPEAKER_03Uh participation uh certificates. Yeah, certificates and ribbons, man. Ninth place, yeah. You get a ninth place award, yeah. Because there's nine pies. Ninth place, man. That's crazy. But um, so I was talking, or I was not, yeah, I guess you can say talking, but uh, with Easter coming up, this is the only time that you can go into a house without being shameful or whatever and fart because your whole house smells like fart because of eggs, smells like ass because eggs, man. If you think so, yeah. You can finally say, Yep, I fart in animal. Yep. Yeah, you go, man. Heck yeah. Sneaky Link's house and fart. Yeah, freaking fart. Yeah, big one, man, and and fart. And speaking about farts, I think we might have talked to talked about this already, but have you ever been like so asleep really good, and your fart just fucking wakes you up and you just Bro, you know what?
SPEAKER_02That's funny, you're talking about that, because two nights ago, bro, I saw it crash out real good, bro. I went to bed at 8 30. Dude, I fart is so fucking bad it woke me up, bro. And then like under my sheets, bro, I was like, God, dude! Holy shit. I was like, fuck. So I opened my room windows and fuck, dude. Damn, man.
SPEAKER_03Fuck, yeah, man. I thought I shit myself. Man, yeah. I one time I did that, man. I was sleeping so good and I fucking farted, like, I think I I scared myself, man. I was just like, felt like a ghost was coming out of my butthole, man. I mean, I mean, not not that I had anything come out of my butthole, you know, besides some shit, but you know, that's what I imagined it. Oh damn man. But I was thinking about that today, you know, because Easter, I don't know if uh a lot of people are still like traditional with their Easter egg hunting, like where they boil eggs and you know, dye them and stuff like that. Um, so I I remember, you know, like uh at my mom my mom and dad's house when we had Easter, it would always just smell like eggs in the house afterwards, you know? Everybody be eating eggs and you know, smell like fart and everything, and I'd just be like, dang, this is a good time to fucking let a fart loose, you know?
SPEAKER_02You know, this Easter, bro, I'm only gonna quarter way boil the eggs. Yeah, bro, that's what I'm gonna do, bro.
SPEAKER_03Oh shit, that's too funny, man. You should uh you should uh what do you call it? Inject them, inject them with something, man. Damn.
SPEAKER_02Like um, I don't know, like, like, like last year, bro, um, I bought the big uh, what do you call it, the big Easter egg? Oh yeah, yeah. I got some spray paint. Yeah. I sprayed that fucking Easter egg gold. And dude, I went to um something sexy and I put all those sexual toys in there. Oh dang! There you go, man. It was like the suckers, the mints, and all that goby bear. That's what I fucking did, bro.
SPEAKER_03Bro, oh, we found a golden egg, and they fucking opened it and freaking dick suckers and everything in there, oh man. I just was funny, bro. Dude, I would I would never have thought of that, man. I think I'm gonna have to do that, man. Yeah, it's funny, bro. Or I'm I'm gonna do that to somebody's pinata. Damn.
SPEAKER_04Mom, what is this? Mom, what's this?
SPEAKER_03All you hear is shh shh. Inside the pinata?
SPEAKER_04Inside the pinata. Mom, the pinata's alive.
unknownShh.
SPEAKER_04Why is the pinata moving on its own?
SPEAKER_03It's a heartbeat. Yeah, it's a heartbeat. Mom, Mom, it sounds like you're you're like like your drawer in your room. I'm just making the same noise as your drawer in the room.
SPEAKER_04Like you're getting a lot of text messages and too funny, bro.
SPEAKER_03And then, dude, it was so funny because one one person too got uh, I'm I'm pretty sure it was a female, uh, got jammed out about me talking about periods, man. Damn. Like uh they said, you shouldn't talk about it if you don't know what it feels like. Damn. And again, I was thinking, I was like, man, it hurts when I get a bloody nose, you know?
SPEAKER_02I get I get cramps. I get cramps, yeah.
SPEAKER_03I don't get cramps if I don't stretch. If I don't drink enough water. I gotta have mustard. Yeah, pickle juice.
SPEAKER_04I take it.
SPEAKER_03But yeah, bro, like I was just like, yeah, it's and like I said, I never care about shit like that, man. Yeah. But for some reason, I was uh I was like, damn, like these people are we're really getting under their skin, you know? And man, and it was yeah, it was just funny, but man, again, it is all just fucking jokes, man. Damn. If you can take your ex as a joke and say you love him, then you can take this podcast as a joke, eh?
SPEAKER_04God damn. If you can take that joke, you can take ours.
SPEAKER_03And take him back to his pubs. And take him back to his pubs, and then pick him up, take him to work, and buy him all kinds of shit, and then he still cheats on you, and you take him back every single weekend, then you can take this fucking podcast as a joke, man.
SPEAKER_04Damn.
SPEAKER_03Oh, damn. You really like that though? Yeah, yeah, it's facts right there, man. Yup, that's Res like Res love right there, man. But he loves me, Mom. But he loves me, Mom. He loves me, mom. She ought it. She ought it. Just let him go. I can't.
SPEAKER_04I don't know how. He just loves me. He just loves me. I met I met his dad, but he's my uncle. Yeah, mom. You know Uncle Johnny, that's his dad. Uncle Johnny.
SPEAKER_05Oh shit, man, that's too freaking funny, bro. Oh man, man.
SPEAKER_04You met Uncle Johnny already? That's his dad. Shiana, that's your uncle! Shiana, that's your uncle, huh? I didn't I thought that everybody just called him Uncle. That's your cousin.
SPEAKER_02That's your cousin. He moved a Phoenix with his real mom.
SPEAKER_03That's why you only saw him during family gatherings.
SPEAKER_04Oh damn, that is too funny.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, uh Johnny's his real dad. Johnny's his real dad. Why do you think we were calling him uncle for? Why do you think we're saying that's your duck?
SPEAKER_04Why why you call him duck? Yeah, what do you call him duck for? I thought it's his nickname. It's who he is to you. It's your uncle! Yeah. Oh, bro. Damn, bro, that's fucking too funny, man. That's hilarious. Uncle Johnny, yeah. That's fucking crazy. I thought everybody called him Uncle Johnny.
SPEAKER_03Oh, damn. But just imagine that shit, bro. Like real life, though. Real life, man. Real life. Real life, red's life. And if that's you out there, then hey, man, as long as you're getting it, I guess. Hey, as long as Jesus says, as long as you're happy. Yup, Jesus says as long as you're happy. That's what the Bible says. The Bible says as long as you're happy, man. So just be Christ-like, alright? Preach it, dude. Preach it. Preach it.
SPEAKER_05Amen.
SPEAKER_03Quiet, quiet. We need choir. We need the choir.
SPEAKER_04Jesus on the main line. Tell him what you want. Jesus at Uncle Johnny's. Jesus at Uncle Johnny's house. Tell him what you want. Jesus at Uncle Johnny's house. Tell him what you want. And after that going to your memory.
SPEAKER_05Oh dude. It's your perfect memory.
SPEAKER_03We can buzz down memory, oh man. Let's call buzzed out memory. Yeah, let's call buzzed out memory, yeah. Damn, man. Oh shit, man. Damn, that was a good laugh, man. That was a good laugh, man. After a long week, this whole week felt fucking long, bro. Like it did, man. I don't know why. But I had I had a great week, bro. Like, freaking, I'm not even gonna lie, bro. It's probably one of the happiest weeks I've had in forever, man.
SPEAKER_02Challenge the fucking listeners. If they got this far, bro, got a hashtag in the comments, Uncle Johnny.
SPEAKER_03Yep, yep, hashtag in the comments, man. Uncle Johnny, hashtag.
SPEAKER_02If they made it this far in the fucking podcast, bro. For real, man. You guys be good.
SPEAKER_03Uncle Johnny. Uncle Johnny, yeah. And if if you have Uncle Johnny, sorry. Sorry, man. Just make sure he's. Just call him Uncle Johnny. Just making sure. Yep, just call him Uncle Johnny still, and it's cool, man. Make sure he's not dating any of your cousins, man.
SPEAKER_02Oh, but oh, guess what, bro? Yeah. I got a big announcement, bro. Oh shit, shit. Let's go. Let's go. Reservation May, bro. Oh featuring QLA.
SPEAKER_03Oh, but hell yeah. Heck yeah, man. Hell yeah, bro. You guys heard that first, man. Uh QLA shells featuring QLA Reservation May. That's a dope song, bro. I love that, man. I know Q's gonna kill it, bro. Yeah, he is, man. Just hopefully he doesn't talk about the same shit. He talks about all his songs. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04I saw you standing there looking at me. I wanted to go up and ask you to dance, but your friend was there. So I just had to take a picture perfect, memory. Oh, dude, that's fucking bad though, man.
SPEAKER_03Hell yeah, man. I'm looking forward to that, man. Hell yeah, man. I'm excited for this, bro. Yeah, I gotta I gotta hear it, man. I gotta hear it when he sends back the track, bro. Holy cow, man. This this week, bro. I've just been working, just just working on uh okay, so I've I've said this to some people, man. I'm I'm pretty dangerous when you leave me by myself when I start writing lyrics, man. I got I got some stuff in the works, man, and it's crazy, man. It's crazy because that that um spark. I got my inspiration, little Drake, shout out little Drake. But dude, man, that spark of writing, that that little that little um ig ignite, I guess ignition, or what'd you say that? Um totally different, totally it's a it's a totally different vibe now, man. And freaking like man, it's yeah, it's so so April 11th next week, man. I got two that are dropping, and then uh just did two more again. Uh and freaking do, man. It's uh, you know, like I said, man, I I think I might just do an album. Damn.
SPEAKER_04Heart uh heartbreaks and ukulele, you see?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I thought it was uh acoustic and ukulele. Yeah, acoustic and ukulele.
SPEAKER_04I thought it was that, bro. I was like, what's it acoustic and ukulele? It's the same thing, dumbass. You say that mic, dumbass is the same thing. Yeah, man.
SPEAKER_03Did I say I thought you said acoustic and ukulele? Sometimes I just freaking black out and don't know what I'm saying. Okay, but come drink to tank, man. Yeah, bro, like um I'm I'm in this, I'm in this little zone, man, to where it's just like um writing, you know, just writing, bro. And some of this stuff is fucking deep, bro. Like I it's been a long time since I've actually been uh I guess on that level, I guess you could say. Um parking at the house, bro. Yeah, yeah, um but yeah, bro, like it's been a long time, bro, and it feels good, man. It feels good to get those creative juices flowing in. So I'm I'm looking forward to it again. April April 11th, man. Next week I'm excited, man. Always comes out. And then also is another one. It's it's it's a secret. One that's gonna drop, but um you guys already heard it, but it's it's uh man, it's it's big d big dicks and big trucks, yeah, big dicks, big trucks, and shy wiener. That's what it's called, man. Shy wiener turtle, turtle mode. Get all shied out, man. But but yeah, dude, I'm looking forward to it. But man, that's fucking some dope news, man. I can't wait. Freaking reservation made, man. Hey, you're man. That's awesome, man. And Chelsea wanted me to jump on it, but man, I I I I I didn't feel worthy enough to write anything for it, man. Heartbreaks and heartbreaks and ukulele's, man. That's where I was at, man. And and uh dude, it it's so cool to be in that funk like that, because you really do, yeah. You really start to like uh look around, question everything, and that's what kind of keeps you writing, you know? And so um, thank you for breaking my heart. Thank you for fucking my life. No, man, not even like that, but uh from the bottom of my heart. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. There you go, man. That's what she that instead of uh heartbreaks and ukuleleys, that's what's for me. From the bottom of my heart.
SPEAKER_02Just the last the heart with the last blend.
SPEAKER_03Thank you from the bottom of my heart, man. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. God damn. Dang, dude, that's fucking cool, man. I I can't wait for that to drop, man. Did he did he say when he's gonna he's gonna send it back to you or anything? He's gonna get it back, ASAP. Damn, man. Tell him his deadline, man. He's probably writing on the bowl right now. Yeah, he probably is, man. He's probably trying to start arguments so he can write.
unknownDamn.
SPEAKER_03Hey, somebody go and cues TikTok and piss him off. Yeah, somebody go to cues tick tock. Female, female, go to Q's TikTok and flirt with him. Damn. Set some part eyes. That way, uh, that way they can get in the argument and he can start writing. Damn. I sent him a um a Pete like fucking two years ago. He hasn't done anything to it. Yeah, yeah, war, man. Damn. Fucking war, man. So I have to get on him about that, man. He owes me. He owes me, man. He owes me. Damn. Q man, yep, Q, man, you owe me, man. But man, dude, that was fucking that's fucking awesome, bro. That's some some good ass news, man. Good things, good things, blessings, man. Blessings, blessings, blessings, man. But we are back here in Shiprock. It was uh Shiprock. Uh was uh it was a nice drive, man. Again, thank you, Shells, for picking me up and just uh freaking being awesome and uh my Uber driver back into um into uh what do you call it? Gallup, man. Hey, it's freaking felt I felt like I was I was a burden for for like uh people to take me to Gallup, you know? Um but it's oh hey ran right into the polls what happens, man's what happens, man. Yeah, yeah. But man, yeah, it was it was like I said, man, it was it was a it was felt like a long week. And um just lucky to be home, man. Uh weekend plans, don't really have anything. Uh was supposed to DJ over at MC Magic, but I'm not too sure if I'm gonna do that. Uh gotta head down to the valley tomorrow um and just uh visit family and then unfortunately lost um lost a good uh good mentor um from the church back in the day. So Saturday we headed over to go pay our respects. Um I'll be I'll be headed down there to pay my respects uh for for the funeral and everything, and then uh just one day trip, bro. Gonna go there, pay my respects, and turn around, come back. Man, I have no business being anywhere anymore. Like I said, man, I love just being home, bro. I'm a homebody, man, and just uh find me at home all the time now, man. But it was but I was asked if I could be part of the MC Magic show. Um not not sure if I'm gonna do it, uh, depending on how I feel when I get back. But other than that, just chill, man. If you guys are having Easter Easter plans out there and you want a guest to come make you guys laugh and uh just eat all your potato salad, hit me up.
SPEAKER_02Eat your yangis. Eat your yangis, man.
SPEAKER_03I'll freaking gobble that up, man. No shame, no shame. Oh man, that's too funny, bro. So drop it in the comments. Yep, but drop it in the comments. Uncle Johnny, Uncle Johnny, hashtag Uncle Johnny, and it's gonna be freaking cool, it's gonna be freaking awesome, man. And uh, man, yeah, just uh thank you so much, man, for just uh vibing with us again. Uh big news, uh Reservation Maids coming out very soon, uh featuring QLA shells. If you guys want to hear it first, we'll only play a couple seconds of it. Damn, you guys gotta go to the street. Yep, guys gotta wait and download it, man. Damn. Don't be don't be that cheap one, alright? Don't be that cheap one that's trying to get it for free. Yeah. Yeah, don't be your ex, alright? Trying to get everything for free, yeah. Don't be Uncle Johnny, don't be Uncle Johnny, yeah. You're better than Uncle Johnny. You're better than your ex, man. You know, don't be them. Don't be them, guys. You know, somebody's really gonna be like, my Uncle Johnny, my Uncle Johnny, man. It's just a fucking joke, man. Just damn, man. But other than that, man, that's that's all we got, man. You got anything else you want to share? That's it, bro. That's it. Heck yeah, man. Again, as always, man, I want to thank all of you guys for listening, for liking, downloading, sharing, all that good stuff. Um, you know, I'm Mike Bitza. That's all I gotta say, man. Representing 1491 Dropouts, representing tribal revival clothing, representing Laughter is good medicine, representing Scratch nerds and the infamous Culture Kings. Uh, don't forget to go to CultureKings.com, use discount code DJW me on every $200 purchase that you guys got, man.
SPEAKER_02Damn.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, man. That's it, huh?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03All right, man. You guys have a good weekend. This is gonna drop tomorrow, which is gonna be Saturday. Um, and then you know what? Jesus comes back on Sunday, man. So y'all better be prepared.
SPEAKER_02Jesus prepared the main line.
SPEAKER_03Jesus on the main line, man. Tell him what you want, man. Tell him what you want, man. Gotta be the Bible says be specific when you pray and when you tell them what you want. Hey man, Jesus around the campfire. Yeah, Jesus around the campfire right there, man. Jesus around the campfire. Tell him what you want. Other than that, man, thank you guys so much again. You know, smile. Lady, smile. Your smile is so contagious, man. Don't forget you're handsome, way beyond words, and way beyond you give yourself credit for. And remember always you are in the favor of the creator. Ciao.
SPEAKER_00Yes, go, she's we want to thank you for listening to the podcast. Order on the campfire. Don't forget to like, share, follow, download, and tell all your friends. Remember the views and expressions are that of the podcast. So don't go crying to your lady or your man telling them you heard this and that. It's more than likely we said it. Remember, if you didn't hear it around the campfire, it probably isn't true. Good around the campfire.